Jasmine Stalker-Firth

We have just come back from visiting the Grandparents Stalker and it was just what we needed. We had a lovely holiday. Everything was perfect, even getting everything in the car and packing seemed quite straightforward this time with our list. And even though we had to do the dialysis and dressing changes and everything whilst there, it was really relaxing. This is most likely because my mum kept doing the washing all the time and cooking us nice dinners, poor thing.

Jasmine had a great time being the centre of attention and all the kisses and cuddles from Grandma and Granddad. Since arriving back here she keeps looking around for all the extra faces coming in and out, as she was waving at my mum and dad everytime they came in the room or when we took her out of a room. I know how she feels as we are sad to be back and enjoyed their company very much. We always forget to take photos so I had to take a couple of quick ones just before leaving and I am sure my mum will tell me off for this one – but I like it, it makes me laugh, as I was sitting on the settee next to everyone when I took this one.

On Saturday, Grandma Stalker took Jasmine out for a walk in the buggy and it was really nice but strange, as it was the first time Jasmine has been anywhere ever without one of us. Neil kept saying things to my mum like: “Now don’t take her trousers off when you get outside.” And my mum looked at him as if he was mad and just nodded, humouring him.

Jasmine’s Uncle Igglepiggle (Iain) came round and Jasmine was captivated by him and enjoyed rubbing his face and sitting on his lap and the white chocolate buttons he brought for her. It was also really nice as I was telling Iain about the latest exchange I have with strangers in the street:

Random weirdo: Oh what a lovely girl. How old is she?
Me: 11 months.
Random weirdo: My God, she is tiny. My baby is 12 months old and can walk and do backflips and is taller than me.

… or some such nonsense. Iain said that he hadn’t noticed if Jasmine was small as she seemed the same size as her cousins which cheered me up no end. And since we are all small (I am five feet tall) that makes sense and what has it got to do with random (tall and not fun-sized) weirdos in the street anyway.

Last week we went to see the transplant surgeons and it was great. I didn’t think talking to them could help, but it really did. The surgeon we spoke to was really, really nice and brilliant. He was very matter of a fact about what they do during surgery and how that would benefit Jasmine, and how Neil would recover if he was a suitable donor. We came away feeling reassured, although when I type that now I get a bit teary, as always. But for the first time since she was born I am beginning to feel in my heart that transplant could be a good thing which is progress. Even though we have been told this many times. We had a funny conversation with our consultant, who is brilliant too, and she said that dialysis shortens your life and then she paused and reflected a little and then said that transplant does too. And when we laughed, she said that transplant was definitely better than dialysis, which it is as it will allow Jasmine to grow and not vomit 20+ times a day.

Last night Jasmine hit the 7kgs mark, which we know was excess fluid so we put on a stronger dialysate bag, but she is not far away and this is progress too, as it feels like she has been 6kgs forever.

Jasmine and I have made friends with another lady and her baby in the building and we go for cups of tea and biscuits, and it is really nice and I enjoy their company. I think Jasmine does too as yesterday we were round their flat and Jasmine was lying on the floor next to the baby (10 weeks old) and leant across to hold her hand and then was burbling at her. We talk about normal baby things like feeding and getting babies to go to sleep and occasionally I might say something that I do with Jasmine but then say that it might be different from normal babyness because she is on dialysis (and is fluid restricted and all the other stuff that goes with it) and everything feels fine. Once over I might have cried. Now I am just thrilled to be sitting about drinking tea and chatting and cuddling Jasmine and enjoying the company of my neighbours, so that is great progress. I lost track of time a bit yesterday afternoon and when we got to the flat Neil was already home feeling weird by himself, as he is never in the flat alone.

Jasmine seems to have extra curly hair today so I couldn’t resist an extra photograph of her here. Her eyes have changed colour too and now seem hazel and not the bright blue they were when she was born. Her teeth at the bottom are a bit crooked and Neil said to Jasmine when they came through, “Oh no Jasmine, you have teeth like your mother.” How rude. My orthodontist and I are very proud of my English teeth.

Jasmine is also very proud of hers and now she has them top and bottom she grinds them together and sounds like a geiger counter.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, January 28th, 2009 at 12:11 pm and is filed under home. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.